he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
