I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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