I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize
