Pants 0. Shit 1.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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