just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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