Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
