Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
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I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
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I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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