I wannas sexs uuuuu
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize