he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
