when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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