So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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