Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
