Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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