My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
