She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
