You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
