we're blogging at a bar
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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