You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
