No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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