the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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