Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Randomize