i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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