She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
