Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
did you just send me my own nude
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