no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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