can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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