I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
