Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
