I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
