So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Dignity is for republicans.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
