it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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