Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
