Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
