Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Randomize
