i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
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Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
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Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize