Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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