well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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