'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
So apparently I’m into choking now
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