Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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