Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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