dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
