But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
