lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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