just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
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To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
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She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize