Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize