Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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