Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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