If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
it was like eating out sand paper
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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