white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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