Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.